‘Tiny House Hunters’: Did These Home Buyers Break All the Rules?

After a house fire destroys everything they own, Seattle couple Jesse and Sarah reach a surprisingly rosy epiphany: Maybe they don’t need so much stuff after all. And so begins their journey on the latest episode of “Tiny House Hunters,” in which they shop for a much smaller place—a tiny place, in fact!—that suits their new “less is more” life.

“We learned that you don’t need as much as you think you need,” says Jesse, a live-events producer.

“It’s great to start over and just be minimalists,” says Sarah, who works in advertising.

It sounds noble at first blush, but come on! We’ve heard these lines umpteen times. Do these two truly have what it takes to go small?

That’s always the question that compels us to obsess over this hit HGTV reality show, in which hopeful tiny-home buyers are shown three options, à la Goldilocks, so they can pick one that’s just right. In the “Fresh Start in a Tiny House” episode there’s a whole lot to learn about what you could be in for if you try downsizing yourself.

Lesson No. 1: Bathrooms never make a great first impression

Realtor^® Jaqueline Phillips takes Jesse and Sarah on a tiny-house hunt that begins at, of all things, a houseboat. While the brand-new 400-square-foot space is spotless, the couple are thrown for a loop. Because of the way the boat is docked, they have to enter through a door that leads straight to the bathroom. Talk about an off-putting first impression!

Their tour begins with a view of the toilet to the left and a shower to the right, then they pass through to the bedroom and the kitchen/living room. Beyond that, another door leads to the front. Why didn’t the sellers turn the houseboat around so buyers could see the living room first? Since, it’s, like, a boat? Jesse and Sarah like the place, but can’t shake their initial bad vibes. It gets worse once they hear how much the floating tiny home will cost (more on that next).

Lesson No. 2: Consider the price of parking, too

In addition to the cost of the tiny house, Jesse and Sarah learn that they’ll have to factor in the cost of where it sits. The house boat, which costs an eye-watering $353,000, also needs $650 a month for docking. This puts the couple over budget, which means it’s time to seek cheaper landlocked alternatives.

Lesson No. 3: Beware of hidden room shrinkers

Next up is a 670-square-foot ranch. It’s cute! But it has baseboard heaters; though efficient, they make it impossible to place furniture flush against the walls. The 8-inch clearance these heaters need means a whole lot of lost real estate in a tiny house. Naturally, the couple pass on this option.

Lesson No. 4: Sometimes you have to spend big to go small

Sarah and Jesse end up falling for the third and largest option: a 720-square-foot Craftsman that was built in 1918. OK, the size stretches the definition of tiny house. Still, the couple need every inch of the two-bedroom, one-bath space—and they’re willing to pay a ton for it!

Which gets at our final lesson about tiny houses: Less square footage doesn’t mean it’s always a deal. While tiny houses in most places can go for under $50,000, the sky’s the limit on how much you can spend on high-end designs and customized features.

The timing and location can make a huge difference, too: Jesse and Sarah live in the ultrahot Seattle market, and they have a budget of $350,000. But a bidding war pushes the price to $385,000! Ultimately, they prevail.

Two months later, they say they’re happy as clams.

All of this has us wondering: Is tiny-house living survivable when you bend the rules—by going larger and spending more than most tiny-house dreamers might think?

New episodes of “Tiny House Hunters” air on Mondays at 9 p.m./8 p.m. CDT. 

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